Want to crack a quick quip to get a funny laugh? You can get a fast laugh (or perhaps sometimes a groan) with these funny short jokes that are easy to remember.
Need to break the ice or want to get everyone more relaxed, there are plenty of short jokes that you can make. And since they aren’t too long, they are easy to remember too, allowing you to get to the punchline before you forget it!
Some of these short jokes can be real lifesavers, if you are in the pinch. They are a great way to get things going.
Ready to pick up some funny lines and jokes? We’ve even classified them by categories so that you can choose the right one for the right occasion!
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Let’s get going.
Best Short Jokes That You Won’t Forget
Short Jokes about Animals
1. What do you call a pair of birds in love?
Tweethearts.
2. Why do birds fly south for the winter?
Because it is faster than walking.
3. How do you get a squirrel to like you?
Act like a nut.
4. How do cats bake brownies?
From scratch.
5. How do you know that elephants like swimming?
Because they always have their trunks with them.
6. Why don’t shrimp share things?
Because they’re shellfish.
7. Why are fish so clever?
Because they live in schools.
8. What do you call a bear with no ears?
B.
9. When do ducks get up?
At the quack of dawn.
10. Why couldn’t the pony perform at the talent time contest?
Because she was a little horse.
11. What is a cat’s favorite color?
Purr-ple.
12. What do you call a lazy kangaroo joey?
A pouch potato.
13. Why don’t cow have any money?
Because farmers milk them dry.
14. Where do cows go on date night?
To the moo-vies.
15. How much money does a skunk have?
One scent.
16. What type of stories do crustaceans enjoy the most?
Lobster tales.
17. What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bull-dozer
18. What fish only swims at night?
A starfish.
Short Jokes about Countries
19. How do you get a Canadian to apologize?
Step on their foot.
20. What is the fast growing capital in Europe?
Dublin.
21. Why wasn’t the man sure if he should move to Mongolia?
Because it has its pros and its Khans.
22. What do you call a bee that lives in America?
USB.
23. Why did the Southerner enjoy the food in Korea?
Because it was Seoul food.
24. What is a lion’s favorite American state?
Maine.
25. Which country has the most calories?
Sweeten (Sweden).
26. What is the fastest country in the world?
Iran.
27. Where do sharks go for holidays?
Finland.
28. Why do the French eat snails?
Because they don’t like fast food.
29. What type of birds do you find in Portugal?
Portugeese.
30. Where do French fries come from?
Greece.
Short Jokes about Jobs
31. What type of award did the dentist receive?
A little plaque.
32. Why did the man become an archeologist?
Because his career was in ruins.
33. How do they answer the phone at the paint shop?
Yellow.
34. Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was out-standing in his field.
35. How does an apple a day keep the doctor away?
If you aim well.
36. Why did the police let the construction worker go?
Because they had no concrete evidence.
37. Why didn’t the man want to be drill operator?
Because it work boring.
38. Why did the book join the police force?
It wanted to go undercover.
39. How do you get a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket.
40. Why did the librarian fall down?
He was in the non-friction section.
41. Why did the man take the job at the airplane factory?
Because it was riveting.
42. What happened to the thief who stole a lamp?
He got a light sentence.
43. Why was the teacher cross-eyed?
Because she couldn’t control her pupils.
44. What did the vet say to the nurse?
Get me the first aid kitty.
45. Why did the kangaroo see the doctor?
Because it was feeling jumpy.
Short Jokes about Sports
46. What goes all around the baseball field but never moves?
The fence.
47. What was the basketball star feel so cool?
Because of all his fans.
48. What are umpires tubby?
Because it is their job to clean the plates.
49. Why are basketball players messy eaters?
Because they’re always dribbling.
50. Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
51. What’s a golfer’s favorite letter?
Tee.
52. What is a frog’s favorite basketball shot?
A jump shot.
53. Where do football players go when they need new uniforms?
New Jersey.
54. Why are hockey players good at making friends?
Because they are quick at breaking the ice.
55. What is a grasshopper’s favorite sport?
Cricket.
56. Which soccer player is responsible for keeping the pitch neat and tidy?
The sweeper.
57. Which goalkeeper can jump higher than the crossbar?
All of them. Crossbars don’t jump.
58. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
59. Why did the soccer ball quit the team?
Because he was tired of being kicked around.
60. Why shouldn’t you play chess in the jungle?
Because of all the cheetahs that are there.
Short Jokes about Food
61. What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
62. Why did the cabbage win the race?
Because it was ahead.
63. Why is a half-eaten banana so popular?
Because it is appealing.
64. What happened to the man who drank eight sodas?
He burped 7-Up.
65. Which fruit make the best music?
Strawberries. They love to jam.
66. What do you call a pair of bananas?
Slippers.
67. Why did the burglar wear green gloves?
Because he didn’t want to be caught red-handed.
68. What is a vegetable’s favorite type of joke?
A corny one.
69. How do berries praise each other?
They say, “That was grape!”
70. What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
A milkshake.
71. What do gingerbread men use to make their beds?
Cookie sheets.
72. What is a table you can eat?
A vegetable.
73. What’s the best thing to put into a pie?
Your teeth.
74. How do you make an egg roll?
Push it down a hill.
75. What did the hamburger chef name his daughter?
Patty.
76. What is a type of jam that you can’t eat?
A traffic jam.
You may also enjoy these funny pizza jokes, mushroom jokes and cheese jokes too.
Short Jokes about School
77. Why did the student eat his homework?
Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
78. Why did the student take a ladder to school?
Because he wanted to be a high achiever.
79. What did the Science book say to the Math book?
You’ve got problems.
80. Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to class?
Because her students were so bright.
81. What is the most popular subject in school?
History, because it is full of dates.
82. Which piece of stationary is in charge of the classroom?
The ruler.
83. What’s a snake’s favorite subject in school?
Hisstory.
84. Why did the teacher make his class take a test in an airplane flying through a rainbow?
Because he wanted them to pass with flying colors.
85. Why did the dog do so well in school?
Because it was the teacher’s pet.
86. How do fish get to school?
They take the octo-bus.
87. Which dinosaur always has the best words?
The thesaurus.
88. What did the pencil say to the paper?
Write on.
89. Why did the music teacher need a ladder?
To reach the high notes.
90. Why did the teacher jump into the swimming pool?
To test the water.
91. What is a wizard’s favorite school subject?
Spelling.
92. Why did the teacher draw on the window?
Because he wanted to make the lesson very clear.
93. Where do surfers go to study?
At boarding school
94. Why didn’t the sun go to college?
Because it already had a lot of degrees.
95. Why was the music teacher locked out of her classroom?
Because her keys were in the piano.
Short Jokes about Words
96. Can February March?
No. But April May.
97. Did you hear about the new word I invented?
Plagiarism.
98. Why shouldn’t you leave alphabet soup on the stove to boil and then go out?
Because it could spell disaster.
99. Why shouldn’t you ever date an apostrophe?
They are too possessive.
100. What do you call Santa’s little helpers?
Subordinate clauses.
101. What’s the best way to comfort an English student?
There, their, they’re.
102. Complete this sentence: if time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like …?
A banana.
103. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can’t opener.
104. Did you know there were on 25 alphabets in the past?
No one knew why.
105. What word becomes shorter when you add two letters to it?
Short.
Short Jokes about Math and Numbers
106. What type of snake is good at Math?
A pi-thon.
107. Why was 6 scared of 7?
Because 7, 8, 9.
108. Did you hear about the student who was frightened of negative numbers?
He stopped at nothing to avoid them.
109. Why is 2 + 2 = 5 like your left foot?
Because it is not right.
110. Why did the square and circle go to the gym?
To stay in shape.
111. How do you make seven even?
Take away the S.
112. What is the butterfly’s favorite school subject?
Mothematics.
113. What did the triangle say to the circle?
You’re pointless.
114. What is a Math student’s favorite season?
Sum-mer.
115. What is a bird’s favorite Math topic?
Owl-gebra.
116. Where do Math teachers go for vacation?
Times square.
117. Why was the obtuse triangle upset?
Because it was never right.
118. What do you call people who support the use of tractors?
Protractors.
119. What do you call friends who love Math?
Alge-bros.
120. Why were the students worried when the Math teacher entered the room with an empty piece of graph paper?
Because they knew must be plotting something.
121. What did zero say to eight?
Nice belt.
122. Why was the equal sign so humble?
Because it knew it was neither greater nor less to anyone else.
123. Why did the two fours skip dinner?
Because they already 8.
124. Why was the student get upset when his teacher called him average?
Because it was a mean thing to say.
Short Jokes about Technology
125. Why are robots never afraid of anything?
Because they have nerves of steel.
126. Why was the computer cold?
Because it left its window open.
127. Why did the PowerPoint presentation cross the road?
To get to the other slide.
128. How does a computer get drunk?
It takes screenshots.
129. Why was the computer late for work?
It had a hard drive.
130. Why did the cell phone wear glasses?
It lost its contacts.
131. What tech job was the spider hired for?
Webmaster.
132. What do computers do when they get hungry?
They get a byte.
133. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. It is a hardware problem.
134. How did the student do in the Microsoft Office course?
He Excelled in it.
135. What is a robot’s favorite snack?
Microchips.
Short Jokes about Things Around Us
136. What type of tree fits in your hand?
A palm tree.
137. Why was the broom late for work?
Because it over-swept.
138. What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
139. When is a door not a door?
When it is ajar.
140. Why did the scissors win the race?
Because it knew a shortcut.
141. Why don’t you find a clock in the library?
Because it tocks too much.
142. What is the world’s scariest plant?
Bam-boo!
143. Why do calculators make such great friends?
Because you can always count on them.
144. What’s the fastest way to get cold hard cash?
Put it into the freezer.
145. Why are mountains so funny?
Because they are hill-arious.
146. Why did the man take a clock onto the airplane?
Because he wanted to see time fly.
147. What time is it when the clock strikes 13?
Time to get a new clock.
148. What sits in the corner and travels around the world?
A stamp.
149. What did the rock say to the geologist?
Don’t take me for granite.
150. How do mountains see?
They peak.
If you enjoyed these jokes, we predict that you will also enjoy these funny birthday jokes or these egg jokes that will crack you up.
